A Scary Halloween

Maya Towelled Up, originally uploaded by Luminosity.

My Halloween night had a quite scary moment and not in the way one might think, not Halloweeny scary.

I went to move Maya's bassinette closer to my pillow just before I went to bed myself when a sleeping Maya suddenly flung her head up with eyes bulging open in panic and she lurched up fighting to get a breath of air. I cried out "Oh my god!" and picked her up as she gave a little frightened. Josh was already in bed and asked me what had happened and I explained as I rocked her side to side, upright in my arms. A minute later though, I lay her down to re-wrap her and she was all smiles.

Mummy wasn't though...mummy was out of her mind worried and wondering "What if I decided to stay in the living room for even 5 extra minutes"? or "What if she did this when I was in the shower during the day?" etc.

Turns out, upon consultation with the maternal health nurse and my mum, that she may have just been startled by me and not, as I was thinking initially, just struggling to breathe coincidently as I walked in the room.

The most terrifying thought in the world to me now is losing her. That's what I mean when I say that, since she's been born, the world really can hurt me now.

I have a shot of her with a pirate hat on, which she borrowed from her cousins yesterday for Halloween...haven't had a chance to upload it yet but will.