Saturday, May 28, 2005

Little Perceived Differences # 1

Some small differences between Canada and Australia that I've noticed.

Canauckians really do attach 'eh' a lot to the end of their sentences. In a noticeable way. I mean, I had a habit of saying 'eh' at the end of my sentences back home but I would say it in one whole breath, for example:

" It was a good movie eh !"

Whereas, I've noticed Canuckians say it with more exaggeration on the 'eh', as in:

" It was a good movie .... ( wait a few beats) ehhh!"

If I was Canadian I'd plan to have the words " I died, eh ! " on my headstone after I carked it.
Jusssst playin with ya, Canuckians, dont feed me to the mooses ! Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Pizza slices are freakin BIG here. They're like two and a half times bigger then Aussie pizza slices.

Matter of fact, a lot of their food/drink/grocery item proportions are bigger.

The obvious: they drive on the wrong side of the road.. When I first arrived here it felt so awkward crossing the road. I would automatically turn my head right instead of left, to look for oncoming vehicles.

Drivers slow down in the middle of a busy road and wait for you to cross over, if you're in the middle. Aussie drivers just let ya stand in the centre and play a game of Frogger as ya look for a big enough gap between cars to scoot across. Though, perhaps they just did that because I had a 'deer in the headlights' look about me. Now I automatically turn my head left when crossing ( yay for me and my road survival, stay-outta-hospital-coz-I-have-no-medical-coverage'ness ! ). Yet I sometimes lapse and check the 'right' way as well lol.

They have squirrels ! Still wondering if the little critters bite ?

They dont have an accent, its me who does.Their accents stood out when I first arrived. But now I've stopped hearing their accent and started hearing mine. Even to my own ears I talk funny lol.Someone asked me my name the other day and when I told them they looked at me quizzically and asked " Thats an exotic name, how do you spell that ?"
"Um T...I...N...A "
" Oh TINA ! "
"How did it sound to you when I said it "?
" It sounded like Taynah or somethin.."
I've lost my accent a couple of times where, one example, I've accidently pronounced 'cant' and sounding out the 'a' like ya would pronounce it for 'can'...instead of how I normally say it, which is pronouncing it like we do 'car' ie."carrnt". Suddenly our way of pronouncing 'cant' sounds rude heh ( I was gonna type out the obvious word it sounds like but its crude and that word grates on me like nails on a chalkboard).


Some other things in short..

Ppl stand on the right side of the escalator and walk up/down on the left side. Probably in relation to the fact that they drive on the wrong side of the road and cant break this habit. Image hosted by Photobucket.com

When they try to put on an aussie accent they come out sounding like a hybrid of South African, British and Kiwi.

Canadian temperature, weather-wise, feels warmer then Melbourne temperature equivalent.. A 17 degree C day here feels like a 24 degree C day back home.

My cat even meows with a Canadian accent.
Meooooow-eh , purrrrr-eh.

A lot of Canadian men treat their women a hella lot better then a lot of Aussie men.Not generalising and saying all on either nationality's part but I've noticed the differences with the whole attitude to the dating game. Canadian men seem to be more romantic, respectful,thoughtful and in 'wooing' mode... even after they've 'got the girl'.
From what I've seen from Aussie men ( in my own experience and in others I've observed )a lot of Aussie guys seem to think that the fact that they're going out with ya and willing to let ya hold their remote control ( when ya pick it up to wipe down the coffee table ) is romantic enough.... haha.

Anyway I'll remember the other observations and make more observations in other posts to come.

Later, eh !

Friday, May 27, 2005

300 + Channels...

... and tonight I finally came across an Aussie show shown on Canuckian cable tv !

Great Aussie show!

They dont just show Steve Irwin here haha ! Although, I suppose the characters arent a far cry from him and the stereotypical 'Dundee' character of which overseas'ers believe all Aussies act,talk and live like ...

At least it aint Neighbours *cringe*


Crikey !

:p

Injustice Served

Click on the link above ( post title ) to see the story I'm talking about.

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Schapelle Corby was found guilty of drug smuggling, in a GROSS case of injustice, in a bali court yesterday.

You wanna know my gut instinct on this woman and this case ?
She was a young woman ,flying out to Bali, who got the surprise of her life when Indonesian security opened up her surfboard case and pulled out marijuana. She, most likely, reacted how I, my sisters or any of my friends would react which was :

This is a mistake and it will all be sorted out soon. Someone planted this on me and it wont be long until my innocence is established and I can go home.
Right after the dope was found, her demeanour seemed to speak that reaction in volumes.

My mum felt gutted watching this unfold because she saw her daughters in this woman. Knowing that she could have so easily been me, travelling on my own to different places and being vulnerable to bastards planting something in my suitcase. She spoke of how she would feel as a mother, KNOWING her daughter could not and would not do something like this and TRYING to make the public understand that she is not just talking as a biased mum ...but as a mother who KNOWS, more then anything she's ever known, that her kid is innocent. And wanting, needing nothing more then to shout angrily in the Indonesian authority's face and take her baby home.

There have been some that have said that an airport worker ( possibly someone in Australian Customs ) is responsible. The thought of someone on the 'inside' of airport customs taking advantage of their position and working in conjunction with a contact in Indonesian ( and other countries )customs does not surprise me.

I wonder how many unsuspecting travellers have had drugs stashed in their luggage by someone at an opportune moment before the luggage gets stored on the plane and removed by someone in customs at the other end, only to pick up their luggage at the carousel none the wiser ? The surfboard case that Schapelle had must have been a cinch to get into.
Pretty smart way to get this shit from one country to the next with not much risk to a few shifty customs employees involved making money doing this eh ?
The drugs enter another country and 'disappear and they make their money. If the drugs are found, by law-abiding airport staff, then the person who owns the luggage lands in the shit...not them.

Some cowardly piece of shit ( or more then one ) is sitting comfortably at home right now letting an innocent woman take a massive fall on his/their behalf.

Thursday, May 19, 2005

Some Dreams

One of the things I want to do whilst in Toronto is write stories.
Or just one long story that could become a published novel.
I want to begin it here and complete it here, thats my goal.

I've been thinking of what I am going to write, where its going to be set and who the characters will be. So far I'm thinking it will be set in New Orleans, mayyyyyyybe in the 1930's or 1940's.
I want my women to wear fab-gorgeous corsets and I want it to have an erotic undercurrent.

Ideally I would write this book whilst living in New Orleans, soaking up its mysterious, romantic atmosphere, its colourful past and present. Listen to the beating hearts and souls of the people who once walked and slept, loved and had their heart broken within it.
Delve into Cajun and Creole worlds.
Follow the ghosts of Voodoo queens.
Its an old dream but a dream which still has oxygen, where a flame still flickers.

I have a sister-dream of doing the same in Tuscany, in some old picturesque villa nestled amongst its rolling hills or reclining on its coastline.
I want to sit at a table with locals and drink wine and eat mouth-melting, sumptuous Italian food with them and listen to their stories.
I want to take my camera, pen and paper and sit in the middle of a field and see and feel for myself why artists are so in love with Tuscany's sunlight, soak up the magical quality in this sunlight they so raved about.

Are these dreams realistic? Dreams are born in the womb of your soul where reality will never touch but where these dreams can eventually emerge dancing into reality.
Only when these dreams are nurtured and cultivated until they're strong enough to see the light of day and withstand the world you move in.

I have to stop this human habit of thinking in the box of 'feasible' and remember that life is to be moulded any damn shape I want it to take. Stop mulling on what is expected of me and go by the compass of my heart.

A New Day

I walked home after work yesterday ( I'm a 15 minute walk from work ), welcoming the fresh air and fading light of the day.
I walk through Mt Pleasant Cemetary which runs alongside most of my walk home and find its a peaceful, pretty place. One can see at least half a dozen squirrels at any given time in this cemetary and having not seen one up close before, I take notice of the little creatures and smile at their cuteness. The first time I spotted one, on my walk home last Saturday, I stopped on the path and watched it. It noticed me too and maybe, having not seen a strange, displaced Aussie before, it took notice of me too and started to approach me for a closer look at my 'cuteness'.
Lol.
I continued walking though because I wasnt sure if they bite/have rabies. Ahhh my Northern American creature naivety ?

As I was walking home I mused apon a comment that Maude made in my "New Country Blues" post; about having a peaceful,thought-collecting place when in a new land.
Well Mt Pleasant is a start, I've yet to discover beautiful peaceful havens this city has to offer. I'm sure there are hundreds and I cant wait to find them.

Taking Lucy to the vet today. I'm not familiar with the city really and never been to this area before so this should be interesting lol. I just went and bought a cat carrier and have to take public transport so wish me luck and hope I dont get lost with a distressed, on heat, cat in a bag.

Wednesday, May 18, 2005

Yucky Day Continued.

Why do people have to be so horrible to staff on the phone ?

Got to work today, after writing the last couple of posts, still feeling down and proceeded to 'get on with it' at the office.

A patient calls, one that I had spoken to the day before. She had called the previous day to reschedule her appointment from Wednesday to this Friday so I did my best to line up a massage with one of our massage therapists and an appointment with Sid, one of our chiropractors so that she could pretty much see Sid after her massage.
Later on in the day I realized that this woman was already in the appt book for Friday ( why did she not tell me this instead of acting like she was simply moving her appts from Wednesday to Friday ? ). Someone else in the office had already booked her in to see another chiropractor, Mila, after a massage with Krista. So I call her, leave a message on her answering machine about this and asked her to call back to confirm.
Today she calls and when I tell her shes seeing Mila she gets all riled up. I tell her that everyone is pretty booked out and this is the best we can do for her but she yells " NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" !!! pretty aggressively down the phone. " I dont WANT to see Mila, I want to see SID. HE is the ONLY one who sees me and its been this way for two years !!". Then started sighing and carrying on saying how unnacceptable this was, that we were mucking her around. I said as calmly as I could " I'm really sorry about this....what do you want to do... ?"
" Oh just nevermind. I'll come in for the massage only. Sid's gonna have your head ".
" MY head ?" I asked.
" Oh whoever makes the appts yada yada ..."

Gotta love copping the shit for other ppl's mistakes. Some ppl dont think about the fact that the person trying to help you on the other end of the phone is simply just a person getting through their day.... possibly someone who is having a bad day and has been close to tears all day themselves.

Guess My Accent Update.

One woman got it right yesterday and asked where in Aus I was from. Probably because she was in Aus and NZ for 6 months so she came to know how we sound.

Yay !

New Country Blues

I think thats whats goin on with me....

First the build up and workin my ass off in two jobs, running around like a madwoman trying to organise my move to Canada in stolen moments whilst AT my full-time job...

Then the excitement of being here in Canada.

Then I started a new job, got a 2nd job in about a week of being here. The office job is only giving me 20 hours a week at a measly $ 10 an hour before tax. The second job fell through because the office job kept me there until 7:30 and it just didnt fit in with the 2nd jobs hours so *plonk* went the bar job, in the toilet.

Yeah I went into holiday mode when I got here and still trying to pick myself up outta it.Things just feel a little strange at the mo and I miss the stability of the full time Monday-Saturday job I had back home...where I got paid half-decently. I had a routine going and now things are all up in the air and I feel vulnerable and down these days. I dont wanna even say " I'm going to do this " etc to other people because at the moment it sounds like just 'talk' ...so whats the point ?

So get off your butt and do somethin about it ya lazy sod, are the words floating around my mind and probably yours too.Stop whining/talking/promising...

The place where Josh works may be going on strike in the coming months and if they do it could last anywhere from two to five months, without pay. So on top of the mountain of debt both of us have, we'll still have to find some way to pay living costs.
New Orleans in August for my birthday is looking VERY VERY iffy right now....
I want to travel as much as I can and see as much as I can of Canada and the world, not be buried under work and paying off debts.

I miss hangin out with my mum and sisters. I miss my nephews cuddles and laughter.

In other news , Lucy the cat is on heat and is being quite noisy about it ( although she is sleeping on the couch on the mo ). Gotta take her into the vet tomorrow for a pre-op then book her in to get spayed. Fun for her eh.

Dont get me wrong, I love Lucy to bits and wouldnt trade her for anything but now shes a responsilbility and if we wanna go see other parts of Canada and the States we're gonna have to constantly get someone to catsit her. Then we'll have to fly her back to Aus and she'll have to be quarantined whilst we travel to Spain and Italy on our way back to Aus ( if we can afford it ).

I had to vent...these are just a few things playin on my mind...I'll probably be fine and back to my normal self very very soon and see things in a different, more positive light. I just dont wanna go home to Aus and say all I did was work and live like I normally do back home which comprised of work,home,work,home, responsibilities.
I just want this to be an adventure.

Sunday, May 15, 2005

May Resolutions

Since I've landed in Toronto I've been so lazy and unmotivated its pissing me off so ....

I resolve to:

Get back into my fitness routine.Take up yoga and pilates again whilst undertaking the usual cardio shtuff.

Go back to eating healthy ( I've put on 5 kg's since I've been here eeek ).

Going to bed at a reasonable hour and starting my days early.

Keep the apartment cleaner.

Spend less time on the net.

Get a second job ( oh man, going from $600 a week to $200 a week bites HARD).

Read all the books I have lined up to read.

Dive into my writing and photography.

Start chiseling away at my mountain of debt.

See more of Canada.

Start saving for New Orleans, Italy and Spain.

Oh myyyy, this ' Getting my ass into gear " task above seems like a lot....Specifically the debt issue :(

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

Ms Puss

I'm a mummy ( oh wait , I'm in Canada so make that 'mommy' )

She was born on September 1st 2004 and she's a green-eyed beauty.

And furry and charcoal grey.

She was adopted from the Humane Society ( Josh went down for a 'look' and fell in love with her at first sight) in Toronto and is the craziest, funniest Ms Puss in Canuckialand. She's been chasing me around the apartment playing a hybrid of tag/hide & seek. I hide around corners and she scales the corner to chest height, whacks me with her grey paw ( " You're IT !!! ) and zooms off.
We were thinking about getting a Russian Blue cat but we couldnt justify spending $ 800 + on a pet and theres so many animals in shelters, needing love and a home . Lucy was the name she came with ( from her previous owner ) and I wasnt too keen on it but she knows that name so ... she gets Lucy, Lucy-Lui , Lucy-belle or Lu-Lu.

Pics to come later as I cant resize my current photos of her ( no photoshop *sob* ), they took up the entire screen.

In other news, I am consistently amused by Canuckians trying to guess where my accent hails from.So far the current score is approx:

South African : 18

New Zealand : 14

Aussie : 3

English : 2

Apparently I dont have a 'strong' aussie accent. I'm guessing its coz I dont sound ocker like Steve Irwin or Paul Hogan.

Saturday, April 23, 2005

Date Night

Kissed awake by gorgeous boyfriend this morning .....

Yeahhh not to shabby a way to wake up *wink*

Aforementioned gorgeous boyfriend had something up his sleeve this morning and departed with a sly grin before my sleepy self had brushed half-remembered dreams out of my eyes. Drifted off back to sleep with " WHAT is he up to ...." thoughts ...finally had enough of the zzzz's and luxuriated, like a lady-of-leisure, in our living room in my 'jama's until I heard his key in the door 10 minutes after rising.

He was back with my new addiction; a large French Vanilla Cappuccino ( ohhh mmmm you-so-fabulous ) and extras ( cheese croissants ). Oh and he'd been across the street and had booked and paid for a pedicure and a gel refill for my nails.

Theres no end to the utter spoiling.

He hung around at home whilst I spent 2 hours at the nail salon and another half hour of me meandering around stores nearby.We hung around the house after I got back then headed out to Silver City to see 'The Interpreter', which is a 5 minute walk away from us. He banned photo taking on our Date Nights but the camera was in my bag and the rain making Yonge Street glisten so prettily... well it was just killin me that I couldnt record tonight in some way so ... yeah three pics were taken ( sorry baby I had to lol ).....

The movie was a " I could have waited until it was out on dvd " deal but could've done worse. We walked home in the rain and threw on ' Jeepers Creepers ' and continued movie night at home ....and prepared to get spooked ...
But we just giggled our way through it....

I've had two and a half glasses of bourbon and coke and I'm feelin buzzed...whatta cheap date eh....?

Passover this weekend. Much family time and dinners this weekend. Josh will get to catch up with his older bro and sister-in-law this weekend, as they are flying in tomorrow from Boston... and I get to meet them for the first time !

The last three weeks have been a pleathora of firsts and new beginnings .... I think my head has just stopped spinnin .... I dunno ...I was beginning to resemble Linda Blair a la The Exorcist ...

More to report .. will log on tomorrow night hopefully ...

Message to you-yes you, you know who you are Mister Boofriend of mine.... I love you bigger then Canada !

- Lovesick ( and still dazed )in Toronto

Thursday, April 07, 2005

Have You Ever ....

...felt so happy and amazed that you've cried ?

Oh dearrrrr me lol..... if you have a weak stomach look away now because I'm about to get sickening again...dont say I didnt warn ya...

Josh, this is for you babe.

I thought I knew all there was to know about being in a relationship with someone.

I thought there was only a distance any man could reach with me, before he came to a dead stop at my impenetrable wall, giving him no choice but to linger on the outside the rest of our time together.

Boyfriends ( and a fiance ) have been and gone and the wall has remained strong and intact. They gave up on penetrating it not long after butting heads with it and I let them, maybe even encouraged them to give up and we'd just resign ourselves to living on opposite sides of it.

And I resigned myself to the possibility that no one would ever have the courage and the fortitude to take a chisel to it or throw over a rope ladder fashioned out of trust and climb over to me. Even whilst I issued protestations and deployed other evasive methods out of a fear that feels as though it's existed in my soul long before I was even born.

But this was what I 'thought' I knew.
Until I met you.
And the amazement I feel springs from the realization that not only do I feel safe with you coming to me on my side of the wall ....I welcome you like a parched, dry-mouthed desert traveller would welcome a deep fresh-water spring. You've awoken so many beautiful emotions inside of me. You hold long hidden facets of my psyche softly in your cupped warm hands and reassure me there's nothing ugly or wrong there, that theres no need to hide them from you. It feels so raw and delicate but the cool air you're blowing on it all is a soothing balm.

Its always been about the other person in the past so its all strange and new having someone make me feel this special and happy.
My automatic response is to turn it around and focus on you, lavish affection and love on you but when you stop me and tell me " This is for you" ... and I paused and realized that I could accept it all, as it is ... on its own ...without guilt....it flicked on a switch somewhere. It was an invisible gift, one that no one has given me before.

I just keep on falling even deeper in love with you. It feels like an endless, wonderful fall into a sparkling nirvana.
Yesterday my emotions just bubbled to the surface in the only way they could at that moment; tears.
Yeah, you're spending your days and sharin your heart with a weird, strange girly... get used to that fact because ( as I tell ya on a regular basis ) I'm stickin to ya like Tarzan Grip bebe lol.
You are the most amazing man, babe, and you have my heart completely. You truly do make this world brighter and warmer and I know we could do anything together in it.
I love you honey.

Love T xxxooo

Playin In Canuckian Waters

Oh have I been a regular lazybum this past week !

I've been slidin outta bed around 10 am'ish each day, hovering over breakfast and peekin around in my regular net haunts, doin a little more organizing via phone with my financial biz back home in Aus, before pulling on my boots and wandering down Yonge Street and poking my nose in Toronto shopping life.

After the busy months just passed, this feels gooooooood!

I got the job at the chiro clinic and start on Monday ! At first it'll be around 29 hours a week so now I need to find a second job to sustain things until more hours are availabubble at this new job. My credit cards are takin punches like the credit-card men they are but they're startin to snarl dangerously at me so I'm crossing my fingers ( and eyes ) that the $$$ will start flowin in again kinddddda soonish.

I introduce myself each day to the city and the city smiles its charming hello back as I walk down Yonge Street. I'm dying to take the camera out and take portrait shots of the many faces of Toronto, its many frowns and grins.

Discovered a very New Orleans flavoured music store around the corner from home and spent a cool half hour talkin to its owner about blues & jazz music and N'awlins. He told me about a great little New Orleans radio station which I'm listening to online as I type. In case you're interested this is the radio stations online address.

This little treasure of a store will be haunt # 1 on my discovery list.

After my Yonge Street ambling, I stop at the Starbucks 6 doors down from home and get my cuppacino skim grande with hazelnut, cinnamon dusting its froth, and head home and sit down at the computer, under the living room window. Watching the ppl go by I contemplate the book I am determined to write before I leave this place. Thinking of Josh, counting the minutes until he gets home.
And I cant recall the last time where I've felt THIS happy and content and inspired in my life.

Tuesday, April 05, 2005

Hello Canuckia !

Wow ....where do I start ?!

It's been so long since I've been online,let alone made an entry in here, the keyboard is looking alien to me ha....

The last month or so leading up to leaving Australia was crazy chaos and stresssssssful.
I had to apply for a U.S visa because of a simple 3 hour layover at LAX. I wasnt eligible for the 90 day visa waiver program because I am going to be in North America for longer then 90 days. So it was a mad stressful rush of trying each day to get an appointment at the US embassy in Melbourne in time in order to process the visa in time for me to leave.
At one stage I wasnt able to get an appointment until the 23rd of March which meant that the Easter weekend fell pretty much straight after and I was leaving on the Easter Monday. So I was having to check the embassy site every day, relying, hoping, praying that someone would cancel any earlier appointment they were holding.
Arghhh !!
Josh checked the site one day, about 20 minutes after I had checked (and had no luck). He happened to have checked at the right time because an appointment for the 18th had just become available, so I left the new girl I was training at work to hold the forte and RUSHED to the internet cafe next door to try to snatch up the appointment before someone else did ( ya have to be lightening FAST to grab appointments as it turns out).
Thankfully I got it.
So, yeah, those weeks were a mad rush of getting documents, photos and id etc together, training the new girl to take over my position at work, spending as much time with my family as humanly possible, packing, shopping for warm clothes, closing bank accounts, writing up my resume,working two jobs and chasing up references etc and other general things one must take care of when they're moving to another country.
And somewhere in there, talk to my boy....
I was exhausted by the time I got on the plane at Melbourne, after tears had been shed with goodbyes to family members.

Anyway .... I'm in Canada as I speak !!
In the fabulous apartment Josh set up for us !
God did it feel good finally being with him again, seeing his face !
I think I've cuddled and kissed him non-stop since I got here.
He put together a 'Welcome to Canuckia ' package which was all layed out on the dresser when we got back to the apartment. My eyes did not know where to look first !
There was a babushka doll set, a BIG bottle of Tresor perfume , shower gel and body cream ( my favourite perfume ) which also came with a gift make up bag full of makeup and another perfume etc. There were tickets to the Joss Stone concert this June , tickets to Mamma Mia, a gift card to La Senza (lingerie) , bottles of wine from the places we're going to visit on the way back to Aus next March (one from Spain, one from Italy ) packaged together with pink champagne and ice wine on a silver platter tray, yummy chocolates from The Ultimate Truffle store, a cd of music he made for me, Body Shop gift sets filled with massage oil, their Sugar and Spice products and more.A subway and street directory. There was a bunch of Cara Lily's and white roses in a glass vase on the kitchen bench ......
I got spoiled ROTTEN ! Talk about bowl a girl over !
The best part though was being with him again...it felt like a dream.
We've spent pretty much every moment together, bar today because he had to go to work.We've gone out on REAL dates and sickened subway commuters by endless smooching and puppy-dog eye'sing each other on the train and allllll that gooey stuff.
It snowed the second morning here and I ran outside in my pj's to catch snowflakes. What ?! I've never seen snow FALL before so I was excited *wink*.

Met one of Josh's best friends ,Annette, on Saturday and then went to his family's house on Sunday for dinner. I was nervous both times but they're awesome ppl so it was great.
Went for a job interview yesterday but I was so nervous and had such a bad case of dry-mouth-itus that I walked outta the interview cringing at myself lol. Bad thing is , though , is that Josh and his mum are patients at this place ( its a chiropractic clinic in downtown Toronto )and have been selling me hard to this guy and that pretty much meant that the job should be in the bag for me right....so if I dont get it how lame is that ?
Lol.

Anyway, I'm writing a book here yet again so I shall shut up for the time being.

See ya soon !

Signed - Lovesick in Toronto

Monday, February 14, 2005

The Arrow Totin Cherub ...

...has alighted amongst us earthbound pigeons once again and wreaked much mushy havoc with his cheeky arrow-shootin ways.

Yes , the mischievous, winged one had a field day on the day of lurrrrrve , Valentines Day.
Boyfriends / husbands around the globe are either being given the silent treatment right now ( "....but baby-honey-sweetheart-lightofmylife , Valentines Day is just such commercialised rubbish , I show you my love in OTHER ways...I'm HERE arent I ....?! " ) or have dusted off their Prince Charming suits stowed under the bed and are currently enjoying the attentions from their Cinderella -turned- nymphomaniac.

I got red rosssssssssses from my boy !

He had them delivered to my workplace and they're gorgeous ( and yeah if I was with him right now he'd be getting the full Cinderella ....oh TMI ).

Babe , ya the best boofriend in the world and I love you madly !

Aside from the brief lil V-Day report , I booked my round-the-world ticket~a~licket two weeks ago. Going to Toronto just feels so much more REAL now. Countdown has begun ; today marks 43 days until I get to be with J.
My eyes and the calender have become close friends and tango on a daily basis.
But still , every day I get up out of bed and curse the clock for insisting its 'get up for work ' time , for not giving me extra zzzzz time and I sleepily walk trance-like into the bathroom and realise ; as tired as I am ....I'm another day closer to J.

Dunno if I've mentioned this yet , its been awhile since I've written an entry in soulsjuice but J has moved into what will be OUR new apartment and I've seen photos of it ! It looks and sounds greattttt ! He wont show me the apt now that he's moved furniture into it and layed everything out , done it up etc but thats fine ...I love surprises. Its just another thing to look forward to seeing once I get there.

Anyhoo , I'ma jet.
Once I'm in Toronto and settled and so forth I will be probably making more entries in here. Lately , I've been so 'unsettled ' and in the strangest sort of limbo since I've moved that I havent been interested in the net. My head is full of work , tryin to get more work , trying to get enough money together to head over to Toronto with , missing J , already missing my family ( even though I havent left Melbourne yet .....) and all the stuff in between.

I know I'm gonna blub like a baby at the airport , sayin bye to my fam.

Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Congrats Zach & Jess !!

A gorgeous & lovely couple , Zach & Jess , just got engaged !

I know Zach from The Photo Forum and Jess recently joined as well.

Zachs proposal : story & pics

Gotta be THE most romantic and creative proposal I've heard of yet !!
I'm tres impressed AggieMan , YO ! ;)

Congratulmalations you two !

No ones perfect ... but two people can be perfect together.... :)





Friday, January 28, 2005

Got it !

Ok the good news I was talkin about in the previous post ....

I got my Canadian Work Visa !!!!

* Much dancing around goofily *

Today I was pretty stressed out , it was another hot day and I was bothered ra ra ra....

Ya know when ya get so stressed out that you feel your stomach all knotted up and your insides feel like they're on fire ...? That's been me lately , especially today.By lunchtime I hadnt eaten all day and started getting stomach cramps so I forced a toasted sandwhich down.


About to knock off from my full time day job and go to the next job. Working tonight ....with a not-very-pleasant person ....
Its been a long day and I have to keep reminding myself to calm down , take deep breaths and keep focusing on the end of March and finally getting on that plane.
I need to spend more time with my family too , in the meantime , because I'm gonna miss them like crazy.

Rain has started to fall on this hot day and I just went outside and stood in it , letting the cool raindrops soothe me somewhat and tame that lil stressball of fire in my belly .... it felt niccccccccce.

This entry is a lil all over the place ...
Ah well .... some days I dont make sense at all ....

Tuesday, January 25, 2005

Busy Girly Bee

Yeah , I've been neglecting my lil blog space in www-land lately.
I moved on the 11th of January and am now sleeping in my sisters living room ( oh joy non-personal space ! ).
Yes I now have to sleep in full pyjama's - top AND bottoms.
Which is a bit o'a pain in the royal butt because Melbourne's currently enjoying a heatwave.
Today , for example , is 35 degrees celcius and tomorrow is going to be 37 C ( 95 degrees Farenheit and 98 F , respectively , for you Americans out there ).

We have the Australian Open on in Melbourne at the mo and all I can say is tennis players are definately earning those bucks playing in this heat. If the rest of us is hot , take a moment to consider that centre court is a substantial amount of degrees hotter...

Speakin of tennis ......

Aussie , Aussie , Aussie , Oi , Oi , Oi !!!

Alicia Molik Eclipses Venus

Hewitt beats Nadal

My dad also landed himself back into hospital last week. Turns out the papa has been neglective of his medication.
He had collapsed in the backyard of his property in Queensland and was unresponsive for at least an hour.
An ambulance rushed him to the hospital and plenty of fuss and worry was made amongst family members.
His reply was to come to conciousness in ER and promptly ask for KFC.
Grrrr smacks have been reserved for daddio.

Other then all that , I havent had a lot of time for online venturing other then the occassional peek in The Photo Forum. I dont have the net set up at my sisters and I have been working two jobs.
Busy Busy Busy....

Oh and I have some good news but I really gotta run to the second job now so I'll report back tomorrow.

Ciao for now kiddies ! * waves *

Friday, January 07, 2005

Letters

Whilst packing the last of my belongings tonight , I came across a treasure trove piled in a basket.
Sat down and wandered down memory lane awhile.
Old photos of myself with friends , ex b/f's , some of my family , some of myself as a baby/young girl...
Birthday cards that I've kept ( yes I keep em all , they dont get chucked lol ).
Then letters.
Letters from my nan , my mum , Lisa...




I've just been sitting here reading all of them ...smiling and laughing at certain lines scrawled across the pages.
Then I started reading the last of the letters from nan and eventually some tears replaced the laughter.
I sat and thought about her and thought silently " I miss you so much nan ....".

Sometimes its almost as if I go through my days thinking she's still around , even though I know shes gone. Then I'm stopped suddenly and reminded of standing beside her open casket , my warm hand holding her cold hand , my fingers stroking her hand just like the way she used to do with mine when we held hands. Gazing at her for the longest time , thinking ...
" She looks so different , thats not my nana..."
Then I leant down in that noisy crowded funeral parlour room and kissed her softly on her forehead and whispered " Bye for now nana , love you...".
And a tear dripped down from my eye , landing on her cheek.
Appearing as though it was her own tear.
No goodbyes in this world can make your heart and deepest corners of your soul ache so badly like this kind of goodbye.

Heres a piece of writing she included in one of her letters...

' A butterfly lights beside us like a sunbeam
and for the briefest moment the glory and the beauty belong to our world.
But then it flies off again and , though we wish it could have stayed...
we feel so lucky to have seen it ........'


That butterfly , my darling , beautiful nan , was you.

I love you.


I wrote a 'letter' to her a few years ago here






Tuesday, January 04, 2005

Trinkets In Boxes

Mum and Mal ( the M&M's ) phoned me at work before lunch , announcing they would be at my place in a few hours , with a trailor , to grab all my larger bits of furniture.
My head was filled with stress already so I was like " Arghhh , I havent got things really ready " !
They tried callin me last night but couldnt reach me and today was really the only day they could come down to do this.
I was grateful I have them to help me though.
I locked up the office during my lunchbreak and ran across the road to my place to organise what stuff was going with them today. Carted things downstairs.
Went back to work afterwards and tried to get in touch with Grace , the real estate agent , only to find shes away on leave. Spoke to an Emmanuel instead and worked out remaining rent to be paid ( for this week ) and getting my bond back etc.
Then paid a shitload of bills , dipping into travel funds to do it.
That was fun lol.
Came home after work and really got stuck into packing away all the little trinkets and belongings I have accumulated over the years.
Beauty products that sit on a shelf , ignored. Books I have read once and stuck in a bookcase. Salt Water Taffey from Ocean City Maryland. Stattuettes given on Xmas's past.
You get my drift.
Tryin to decide what to sell at a garage sale , what to send ahead of me to Toronto.What to give to my mum and sisters....
I'll look at something and think " I want to take that with me to Toronto " then I'll force myself to pack it in the 'Not coming with me ' box.
Even stuff that isnt of sentimental value , like a box of never-used Mikasa wine glasses or the like , I would take with me for my apartment in Toronto if it wasnt so expensive to ship over there.
Have a stackload of junk destined for the tip too.

Every time the mail arrives at work I hope that one of those letters is a letter saying I've gotten the work visa.
Gettin a second job to save the money I realllllly realllllly need to save for the trip is one of the 'stress' issues. The second is getting that visa.
Then theres campin out in my sisters living room for the next 9 or so weeks , the longer commute to work and the getting home at midnight and gettin up at 5 am every morning ( if I'm lucky to score a second job )....

And I'll stop now before I really turn this into a 'pity party ' and start gettin stressed up over it all again , like I was earlier today...

It was just one of those days where I'm lettin everything crowd on top of me. In the grand scheme of things these things are tiny. I'm sure there are many ppl who would swap their greater troubles with my tiny , minute ones in a nanosecond.